Are You KIDDING Me With This???

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Okay, Now It's a Thing

Did I mention that I do not usually check my horoscope? I used to. I used to look it up every day, not because I believed in it, but because I thought it was interesting how some people put so much weight into their horoscopes. I tend to think they're pretty vague and generic, so you can fit yours to whatever circumstances shape your day. The fact that some people swear by them is endlessly fascinating to me. But before Crush and I had that conversation about his horoscope, which led to me looking mine up, it had probably been years since I had checked it. Now, however, it's a thing.

It almost broke me the other day. I can't let that happen again. And I can tell that my horoscope is a little worried about the fact that I'm keeping closer tabs on it now, because it had this to say to me today:

"Do you have a romantic evening planned for tonight? If so, dear Taurus, it is likely to turn out to be all you had hoped for. You'll be especially attractive, and your naturally warm and loving nature will be all too apparent. Even casual encounters with friends may bring about closer bonding, and new acquaintances are likely to become friends. Your communicative skills are very high at this time, and people of all kinds are likely to respond to you. Go for it!"

Can you BELIEVE that???? My horoscope is kissing my ass! "You'll be especially attractive" is its little way of saying, "Hey, sorry about that crap the other day. Please don't hurt me. I love you." I mean, it's totally true....I've got some serious hotness happening lately, so it's no wonder that my horoscope picked up on it. (*insert good-natured guffawing here*) But it's such an obvious attempt to get on my good side, it's almost pathetic. And that "Go for it!" at the end? Is totally my horoscope thinking, "If I tell you you're going to get some action tonight, will you be so busy that you'll forget to kick my ass for that not-so-helpful stuff the other day????" Like I ever forget to kick a deserving ass. Not for sex anyway. Maybe for a banana split..... mmmmmmmmmm.....

As a side note, the "casual encounters with friends may bring about a closer bonding" crap? Was totally referring to Flip, I'm sure, who tagged me today with a meme. I would have responded tonight, if it wasn't for the fact that I'm still contemplating my response. I went through a couple different ideas, such as calling over Best Friend and searching for the episode of Stargate SG-1 where our intrepid explorers save the world AGAIN from an asteroid headed straight for Earth. That way we could take notes and see if there was anything applicable in there that we could use on the meteor. But that is my inner geek answering and not the rest of me, so I'm still thinking about it. Same with part 2 of the meme, tagging someone else with a question. I have to give this one some thought. So thanks, Flip, for wanting to "bring about a closer bonding" or whatever. I'm totally blushing over the fact that you find me interesting enough to want to pick my brain in that way. When I have an answer for you that honors the interest you have taken in me and my little corner of the universe over here, I will post about it. Until then, it's late, and my horoscope says I need to go do incredibly naughty things to my husband now.


At March 13, 2006 10:30 AM, Blogger Raven in NYC (aka Mark) said...

If I thought you were gonna become obsessed with your horoscope I wouldn't have shared mine. Might I suggest a new obsession?? ;-)


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