Are You KIDDING Me With This???

Wednesday, May 31, 2006


Well, all I can say is that it went better than I expected. (Okay, that's not all I can say. Clearly. We've all seen how wordy I can get about a subject. But I was being metaphorical. Or something. I digress. Let's move on.) The Ex-Boyfriend called just about the same time I was getting ready to pack Turtle into the car and head out to the restaurant where we would be meeting. I kind of rolled my eyes when I saw the caller id, expecting that he was calling to blow me off. Again. But instead, he was calling to confirm that we were still on. That scored a few points, considering I was always the one trying to pin him down before The Great Disappearance of 2005.

We hit the parking lot within 2 minutes of each other, which was perfect timing. I did not greet him with what used to be our usual hug and kiss on the cheek routine, but I was cordial enough. We were quickly seated and I initiated the conversation, by asking him what was going on at what used to be our mutual work place. I knew this would be safe ground, because he had given me enough information in our phone conversation for me to determine that a) there was a LOT of ground to cover in catching me up on the goings-on of my former office and b) it was juicy! (I had decided, while I was getting ready this morning, to get him to talk about himself first. I didn't want to start by talking about myself first because there were a lot of crappy things that have happened to me in the last six months, and while I was more than happy to have lunch with the Ex, I wasn't committed to whipping out my life story right away, particularly if he wasn't going to stick around after this.)

(Turns out, that was the perfect strategy, because while he talked, I started remembering why I liked him so much in the first place. The easy chemistry. The natural way he has with Turtle. The sense of humor. The self-deprecating way he discussed his disappearing act. Dammit, he made it really hard to hold a grudge, not that I'm prone to that. {Okay, I'm prone to grudge-holding if you've wronged someone I love [I'm looking at you, Oscar's dad!], but if you've wronged me, I'm pretty forgiving. Just don't make a habit of it.})

Catching me up on what's been happening in the Ex's life took up about 75% of our time, which I appreciated. Then it was my turn. I glossed over a lot of details, because, again, I'm not ready to commit my life story while he's busy getting my trust back. But I gave him enough to, if he's smart, make him feel a bit more like crap for disappearing when he did. (Heh....I may not hold a grudge, but I'm certainly not above sending him on a little guilt trip before he earns my blanket forgiveness.)

In the end, we parted with a hug, and went our separate ways with vague commitments to "do this again soon." I don't know if he'll call again, and I haven't decided yet if I should call him. (I can hear Snark's Mistress in my head saying "I don't know how you can call someone who is dead to me.") But even if we never speak again, I'm glad that we had this lunch and that he felt I was important enough to get in touch with after such a long absence. That alone means quite a bit to me. (So does the fact that he picked up the check for really doesn't take that much to impress me.)

(Parentheses, for example? They impress me.) (A lot.) (Okay, I'm stopping now.) (No, really.) (I'm done.) (I promise, this is the last one.)


At June 01, 2006 8:24 AM, Anonymous McMama said...

OMG. I have so been waiting to find out all about your lunch with xbf. Thanks for sharing. Also, do you think it's wrong that I'm so interested considering I'm Oscar's mother?! Nah, me neither. Maybe when you come to visit we can get a bf to share. Mmmm....

At June 01, 2006 9:08 AM, Anonymous Lunatic Wife said...

Ok...but what I really want to know is the answer to "The Other Boyfriend's" question.... Who is cuter?


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