Are You KIDDING Me With This???

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Wanna See What's In My Box?

I love getting packages in the mail. Have I mentioned that? I love it. LOVE. So when the Boyfriend mentioned he was sending me a package, I was extremely excited. I didn't want to assume he'd get me anything, just because we had sent him something for his birthday. But I hoped a little. And when he told me he had taken it to the post office and it was on its way? I couldn't wait to get it.

Except that I could and I did, because the United States Postal Service was in no hurry to bring that package to my doorstep. I don't know when they reinstated the Pony Express, but tired horses meandering across the country are the only reason I can think of for a package to take that long to get from New York to Phoenix. Still, it was worth it, because when I opened up my box, I found some really great stuff.

Like this:

5-23-2006 9-16-49 PM

First of all, let's take a moment to admire the packaging, shall we? Each little bottle was nestled into the potpourri, with gold tissue paper holding it all inside the sturdy box. It was a beautiful presentation. But the beautiful presentation was nothing compared to the ACTUAL gift. Massage oil, people. My Boyfriend gave me massage oil. Can you imagine? Too bad he's not here to rub it into my sore muscles after my grueling trip to the gym today. But he did give instructions to Oscar to do him proud. My back is tingling just thinking about it.

So that was the classy part of my gift. The next part of my gift was decidedly less classy, but a hell of a lot of fun. It's, let me just show you:

5-23-2006 9-15-34 PM

Oh, yeah, baby....this isn't Turtle's rubber ducky. I don't know what it is about my boyfriends giving me vibrators, but Oscar's first gift to me when we started dating was a vibrator. I don't know where they get the idea that I'm THAT kind of girl. probably stems from the fact that I AM that kind of girl. Right. It should come as no surprise that I have wanted that particular "personal massager" for a while. Call me twisted, but I think there's something incredibly appealing about a rubber ducky in a devil suit having battery-operated epileptic seizures. Now that I've taken the appropriate pictures, I can't wait to rip it out of its packaging, stuff those batteries in it, and see what it can do. As a matter of fact....I think I sense a bath coming on. I'll be back in a amongst yourselves.


At May 24, 2006 7:19 AM, Blogger Raven in NYC (aka Mark) said...

vibrator?! I have no idea WHAT you're talking about. As far as I knew it was a cute rubber duckie in a devil outfit. What else it does I have nothing to do with ;-)


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