A Love Affair For The New Millenium

We got a DVR installed on Sunday. It's a wonder I've gotten anything done since then. Well, technically, the only reason I have gotten anything done since then is that it does take time to build up a library of recorded shows. But I don't think I'm too far away from giving my first born child to the DVR gods. Seriously. It's the most totally awesome piece of technology I think I've ever owned or wanted to own. I'm so in love with my DVR, Oscar is torn between elation that I finally have a love affair with something technical and despair that he'll probably never pry me away from the television to have hot monkey sex ever again. I have a nagging sense that this may cause problems in our marriage down the road. But so long as I get custody of the DVR, I'm okay with that. We can negotiate on custody of Turtle.

So what took us so long to succomb to the siren song of the DVR? Well, I blame it on our cable company. For a long time, we were in a small section of the city that was only serviced by one cable company. And that cable company sucked. Hard. The signal was never great, and their customer service was barely helpful. We often lost connection for hours at a time for no discernible reason. But it was all we had so we dealt with it. We paid our bills, we hoped that the signal wouldn't be lost in the middle of Grey's Anatomy, and we prayed nightly that the larger, better, more popular cable company in the area would one day start servicing our little neighborhood. And until they did, we didn't want to get sucked in to paying for more equipment or more service from a company who had a hard time even providing us with the basics.

Then, one bright sunny day, while the birds chirped and the flowers bloomed, we got a letter in the mail from the larger, better, more popular cable company in the area. And in this letter, they informed us that they had bought out our crappy little cable company and we could soon be welcomed into the loving embrace of their faster, more reliable service. I could hear the choir of angels singing their Hallelujahs. And when the angels were done singing, they encouraged me to finally order the DVR. So order it we did.

I have now had the DVR for a week, and as I mentioned, I am in love. We're still in the beginning stages of our romance, so it's all giddy and breathless anticipation for the moment we are next able to see each other. I haven't known him long enough to learn his faults. Right now, all I can see is how he's going to change my life for the better. And I can't even imagine how I lived my life before he came into it. But if I were to place bets, I'd say that this is a love affair that's meant to go the distance. I know a lot of people don't believe in love at first sight, but this is the real thing. Cymber + DVR 4Eva!