Project Runway: The Reunion

Before I start on the reunion show, I just wanted to mention, for all two of you who rely on my Project Runway recaps every week, that I am sorry I did not have anything to say about the last episode. The fact of the matter is, nothing really happened. Nobody got auf'd. All four of the remaining designers are showing at Fashion Week. There was, therefore, no point to that episode. Besides, I'm still perplexed how Uli can make the same damn dress she's been making all season, except for having cut a foot of fabric off the skirt, and have the judges beside themselves with love for her "originality." Please. Give me some scissors and I can transform my wardrobe, too. That doesn't make me a fabulous designer. GAH!

Anyway, on to the reunion show. As anticipated, any scene including Keith was awkward and uncomfortable. I loved that Tim and Heidi were all over his ass and wouldn't let him get away with the delusional crap spewing from his lips, but at the same time? It's very discomfiting to watch a man so determined to accept zero responsibility for his actions. They put the books in my room? Are you kidding me, Keith? She pointed to the door, like I should leave? Really? I was set up? I was just a blameless victim? Give me an effing break. I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt, Keith, and say you are a grown up. As a grown up, you do not enter into a contract that you expect to govern your life for any period of time without reading all of the provisos and quid pro quos. You check the fine print. And you abide by it. If you brought books to the show, even to the first day, even if they were taken away from you at the door, you have already violated your contract. If you leave the show, you have violated your contract. So don't even, buddy. We're not buying what you're trying to sell. You're a big cheater. You got caught. Own it and move on.

Next up, the other delusional nutjob on the show: Vincent. Oddly enough, I think I understood what he was trying to say with the whole "amateur" discussion, which either means that I'm living in the same parallel, insane universe Vincent is or that I just happen to speak "Crazy." But that still doesn't change the fact that he really needed to shut his trap. His career in fashion was decades ago, and while I appreciate that he may have enjoyed a degree of success then, things are different now. And he can talk all he wants about how much better he is than everyone else, but his ass was still auf'd before the final four. That said, watching him lose his shit over the damn laundry was priceless. Particularly when you have Kayne and Michael both looking over the railing going, "Is that Vincent?"

Then, of course, we had the Mommygate Redux. I found it quite interesting that Laura attempted to defend Jeffrey during the discussion of that whole situation. And I honestly want to believe that not even Jeffrey would intentionally set out to make someone's mom cry, even if that someone is Angela. So I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt that he wasn't deliberately trying to make her feel like slime. But still. The man needed to take some responsibility for his appalling behavior, and I don't believe he did. Saying he didn't set out to make her cry is not exactly admitting that he didn't treat her very well and should have been nicer. We'll call that whole thing a wash.

As for the funny? Well, I don't think anything is going to top Santino's Tim Gunn impression. I still can't pass a Red Lobster without chuckling. That said, the clips on Tim Gunn's vocabulary were pretty amusing, as were the ones featuring the designers and their own special phrasing. As though I didn't already have enough reasons to love Laura, her "serious ugly" clip made me worship her anew. But my favorite was the word count on Kayne's Miss USA pitch session. Kayne always had a special place in my heart, and listening to him talk a mile a minute was a big reason for that. Seriously though? Almost 1000 words to Miss USA's 7? That's got to be some sort of a record.

All in all? The show had enough Dra-ma in it to whet my appetite, as well as the funny to keep things from getting too uncomfortable. But honestly? It's all about the previews for next week. Did I see correctly? Is Laura accusing Jeffrey of cheating? Scan-dal! It's all so deliciously fabulous. God, I love this show.

Carry on!