Are You KIDDING Me With This???

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

It's A Shame, Too, Because Gabriel Macht Is Hot And He Was THISCLOSE To Selling It

On today's list of things that are annoying me is a little gripe I have with the writers of romantic comedies. Now, I love me some romantic comedies. I'm the biggest sap in the known universe, will cry at the drop of a hat, and am a huge sucker for the happy ending where the guy and the girl ride off into the sunset together. However, I'm also not stupid. And while I'm perfectly willing to suspend my disbelief on any number of implausible situations, there is one thing common to most romantic comedies that's really getting under my skin.

You know that scene towards the end of the movie in which the couple, who for whatever contrived reason has broken up or is otherwise questioning their relationship starts working on their reconciliation because one half of the couple has come to find the other half of the couple and gives a huge speech about how they are "meant to be!" and the other half of the couple realizes that their fight was really stupid and he/she swoons and they kiss and all is right with the world because they have again affirmed that they are "meant to be!"? You know that scene? WHY does that scene always feature the one half of the couple interrupting the other half of the couple in the middle of doing something important in public?

IT MAKES NO SENSE! Do people just automatically delete all contact information they have for their significant others at the first sign of trouble in a relationship? Is there NOWHERE else they can think of to reach their partners than the VERY public venues they are known to frequent? Can she not just call the guy and ask him to dinner and a nice chat? Can he not send her an e-mail and request that they meet for caramel macchiato martinis at the Macaroni Grill and talk about where they stand? I mean, COME ON! Why does he always have to interrupt her teaching a cooking class when he realizes they should give up this silly fight and be together forever? Why does she always have to interrupt him giving guitar lessons when she goes to apologize for being a doink and ask if they can have a second chance?

And why are the people who end up being witness to these great proclamations of undying love never pissed that they paid good money for this class or these lessons and they're not getting their money's worth? You can't tell me there isn't a single cynical bastard who's going to make a snarky comment about how he isn't paying to watch people make out. Instead, they're all going to be overcome with the romantic rightness of it all and either applaud or start making out themselves? I don't think so.

I mean, don't get me wrong. Nine times out of ten, I watch that scene and it gets to me. I swoon, as I'm supposed to, and I gaze adoringly at the guy and wish Oscar could channel that guy once in a while because I'm only human and I like to believe in fairy tales, too. But that other time out of ten, I'm sitting there wondering why the movie didn't come with a barf bag because really. There's sweet and romantic and then there's contrived and stupid and when you cross the line, the cloying saccharine sweetness of it all is too much for any one person to take.

And I really wish "Because I Said So" had understood the difference.


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